Sick Leave

I urgently needed a few days off work, but I knew the Boss would not allow
me to take leave. I thought that maybe if I acted "CRAZY" then he would
tell me to take a few days off. So I hung upside down from the ceiling and
made funny noises.

My coworker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was
pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss would think I was "CRAZY" and
give me a few days off.

A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked, "What are you doing ?"

I told him I was a light bulb.

He said, "You are clearly stressed out. Go home and recuperate for a couple of days."

I jumped down and walked out of the office.

When my coworker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss said to her, "And where
do you think you're going?"

She said, "I'm going home too, I can't work in the dark!"

Employee of the Month

The Playboy Bunnies

Three rabbits escape from a testing lab. On their first night out they find an entire field full of carrots. They eat themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night.

The next day they find an entire field full of female rabbits. They all do what rabbits do best, and the trio sleep throughout the night.

The next morning, the rabbits get to talking.
"I'm gonna go back to that field of carrots," says the first one.
"I'm gonna go back to those cute little girl rabbits," says the second.
"I'm going back to the lab," says the third. "I'm dying for a cigarette."