Quickies

Q: How are husbands like lawn mowers?
A: They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work.

Q: What happened to the blonde ice hockey team?
A:They drowned in Spring training.

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

A woman walks into a hardware store and says "I want to buy a hinge." The clerk says "Do you wanna screw for that hinge?" The woman says, "No, but maybe for the toaster."