Downsizing

The boss was in a quandary. He had to downsize somebody. He had it narrowed down to one of two people: Mary or Jack. It was an impossible decision. They were both super workers. Rather than flip a coin, he decided he would fire the first one to use the water cooler the next morning. Mary came in the next morning with a horrible hangover after partying all night. She went to the water cooler to take an aspirin.

The boss approached her and said, "Mary, I've never done this before, but I have to either lay you or Jack off."

"Could you jack off?" she said. "I feel like crap."